On Friendship...

I am quite possibly the most awkward, insecure, overwhelmed friend of all time. 

My husband has had to actually convince me that someone was my friend (on multiple occasions)– I have an incredible amount of insecurity when it comes to friendships. Where this stems from I’m not sure.  I have amazing friends, really I do, but that wasn’t always the case. This isn’t about them however. This is me and my self-awareness on friendship. 

I want to know, why we instantly bond with the drunken girls in the bathroom (tell me you’ve never done it…) yet we have a hard time connecting in the “real world”. Why do we continually walk this fine line between friendly and friendship? What is the tipping point that makes us besties for life?

As my husband, likes to remind me, girls are weird. We're complicated, we're opinionated, and while we are incredibly deep, we can also be insecure and shallow. We will never be defined, and perhaps that’s where the boundaries of friendship can get a little fuzzy.

Early in friendships I have found myself over compensating by hosting lavish brunches, covering dinner to make people like me (and make sure they come) – when really, often they already do. Or sometimes they don’t, and what I am slowly realizing is – that is OK

One of my favorite sayings of late is, “You will be too much for some people. Those aren’t your people” (I’ve seen many different versions of this attributed to many different people, I’ve lost count, so if you know the original author PLEASE tell me) and oh how true this is. Why are we forcing these friendships? Why are we so upset when everyone doesn't want to be our bff ?

It can be difficult to walk away from someone you think should be your friend. I get it. You’re in the same “place in life”, you have similar interests, your significant other/dog/children get along - but you just don’t click. Girl, bye.  Make small talk at the next neighborhood BBQ, be polite at the dinner party, grab coffee while the kids play, but DO NOT force it.  

Here is where the self-preservation kicks in, be open and willing to accept new friendships, but know you do not need to accept all of them. You are not Nutella, you cannot please everyone. 

My need to make sure everyone is ok, everyone is happy, everyone likes each other forgot one very important person. I forgot to check in with myself. Am I ok? Am I happy? Do I even like this person?

Connecting with someone that is invested in your friendship as much as you are, that values and respects you unconditionally is such a rare and awesome experience. I am working on setting my “friendship boundaries” and also being more open to people outside my “we should be friends” circle. 

XOXO | SLL  

#turnitaroundtuesday 7.18.17

This weeks theme is rejection. We've all been there personally, professionally, romantically etc... rejection is all around us, and not going away any time soon. I have been working hard to turn my rejections into redirection.

Really putting in the hard work to figure out why, either I am feeling that way - or why the idea/person/place/thing is rejected. Let me tell you, its not fun. But for the first time in my life it has shifted my mindset into what I can do to fix the situation to my satisfaction versus placing blame on the person rejecting me. Holding myself accountable and finding a new direction to accomplish my goals is a really empowering experience.

What is something you like to do to redirect your rejections?

Pool Friendly Make-Up

I spent a heavenly day yesterday floating in our best friends pool in my new unicorn floaty (thank you Prime Day!) sipping on some ice cold rose!

When I was getting ready yesterday I realized how much I change up my make up in the summer - specifically when I know I am headed to the pool or beach. I rounded up my top picks for sweaty days that can stand up to a few splashes! 

First, you don't want to go caking on a ton of foundation if you're just going to sweat it off - I personally use a BB cream as my foundation every day and pool days are no exception.

I love this one and have been using it for years - they stopped carrying it in drug stores but I stock up on Amazon. It gives me some pretty good coverage, a dewy fresh finish and most importantly some SPF. Link: http://amzn.to/2tjtAbi

Depending on your needs you might be able to skip this step, I then add some concealer under eye or as spot treatment. I really love the IT cosmetics bye bye under eye, its waterproof, stays put and doesn't get all gross when you get sweaty. Link: http://amzn.to/2t8AifY

Next up, tame those brows! A clean polished brow can do so much for your face. I am super fortunate that my sister, Erin is an amazing brow artist and helps keep my caterpillars in line. I do have a few scars in by brow line so I use Anastasia Beverly Hills - Brow Definer in Soft Brown to pencil them in. This is the easiest to use and the most long lasting brow product I have been able to find. Link: http://amzn.to/2vuIFTQ

I like to use a nude eye shadow on my whole lid for some even coverage and a little pop. I generally reach for MAC "Naked Lunch" for this purpose, and I would share a photo of the shade however I reach for this shade so often that when I went to take a picture there was barely anything left on the palate! 

Next up, a little highlight and blush in one - again back to Anastasia and the Glow Kit. I have been using "Amber Gold" on my cheeks. Link: http://amzn.to/2vuLggy

Now mascara... this is a tricky one... right now I am using the waterproof version of "Better Than Sex" by Too Faced. And in full disclosure its impossible to get off, like its on there until your lashes fall out which I don't love. If anyone has any recommendations here I would love to hear them! 

The last thing I always have with me for pool days (and being out side in general)is this awesome brush on sun screen I found, I actually got it as a two pack at Costco but Amazon has it as well -  its awesome because it gives you a little coverage AND reapplies your SPF!

 Link: http://amzn.to/2t89bBW

---

I'd love to hear your warm weather or pool friendly beauty tips! Drop them in a comment below! 

XOXO | SLL 

Fast Friday 7.17.17 (The Lazy Girl Skin Care Edition!)

So... I completely fail at the whole take your make up off every night, regular skin care etc part of life. However I also know I am completely blessed with good skin, its actually something I get complimented on most.

I am noticing as I get older (eeeeeeeeek!) how much better my skin looks when I take care of it... so here are my tips for keeping that skin healthy and glowy when you're too tired, had a few too many glasses of wine, just plain lazy to wash your face. 

These are the exact products I use (and they're all under $20!) 

Step 1: Cleanse, with a cotton pad and micellar water, you guys this stuff is pure magic. It has seriously changed the game for me, I HATE washing my face - wet sleeves, water everywhere mess - no thanks. Put a little on a cotton pad and wipe your day away! 

Link to purchase:  http://amzn.to/2uZRzcP

---

Step 2: Serum, I'll admit I thought this was ridiculous but it really makes a difference. I have been using one with Hyaluronic Acid (holds tons of moisture) and Vit C and have noticed a more moisturized and brighter skin tone. A little goes a long way, a bottle lasts me months.

Link to purchase: http://amzn.to/2tb4WJP

---

Step 3: Moisturize, I never realized how important this step was. I first got a sample of this in my Ipsy bag and have been hooked ever since. Its light weight, not greasy, works great under make up also. 

Link to purchase: http://amzn.to/2vlfEKx

---

...and thats it! Really, this takes like 2 minutes tops and you will wake up fresh faced and feeling way better about that 3rd glass of wine - I promise! 

*** note this is my NIGHT TIME routine, be sure to add some good SPF for daytime *** 

The Closet that Broke the Camel's Back?

I know it sounds odd to have to talk about self care - I mean why would anyone NOT take care of themselves? Well let me tell you... it happens.

On Sunday, when I was getting ready for what was supposed to be a lovely day of brunching and floating in the pool I heard an odd noise and the light in my room shifted. I looked over and saw that my ENTIRE, yes ENTIRE closet was falling down. For those that know me - you know how catastrophic that is... (and dont worry full blog post on the closet  will follow) 

Thankfully, I have a really handy husband (who got tired of fixing the shelf for the 900th time) and agreed to install the beautiful built in closet I have had my eye on for years. I'll admit I was the only one smiling like an idiot on the way to Lowes with dreams of a pinterest perfect closet in a few short hours. Oh how wrong I was. Not only was it one of the hottest days of summer so far, it was humid and pretty physically demanding work. It also took 12 hours. 12 hours. Thankfully we got all the building done, the cabinets and shelves installed and ended the day still married. 

Fast forward to Monday morning, I woke up sick. Really sick. 

I spent the last 2 days knocked on my ass. Like hot mess express, took messy bun to a whole new level, knocked on my ass. I was flat exhausted which brought with it a lovely fever (during an insane heat wave) as well as a ridiculous sore throat and some body aches and chills just to make it extra fun.

I realized that I had been letting my self care slip and it all came crashing down, kind of like my closet... no extra shot of espresso or extra support bar was going to repair me or my closet this time.

The positive, I have a whole bunch of new shows to share with you all, probably spent way too much time on Amazon (sorry babe!) and used the label maker to label ALLLLLLLL the shoes in my new spiffy closet. 

 I realized  from my 48 hours of house arrest was really how often I forget to put myself first, I've outlined a couple things I plan to implement into my life below. 

1. Spend at least 30 minutes, alone, per day doing something that makes me happy - first up finishing that book I have been carrying around for months. 

2. Get active at least 3 times per week - I've started with a personal trainer once a week and plan on carrying that on by myself a few additional times. 

3. Say NO - you guys, I have serious FOMO, like serious. But really, do I need to say yes to everything I am invited to? NO. 

4. Journaling - I have this adorable sentence a day journal that has been sitting in my house untouched for about a year. I generally write down things I am thankful/grateful for in my day planner but using a dedicated journal makes it feel more powerful. Knowing that its just one sentence makes it feel less daunting then having to keep up with a wordy journal. 

(Link to the one I have: http://amzn.to/2sQOXfE) 

5. STAY organized. I notice how much better I feel when my home is in order. I am going to work hard to take the time for ME to stay organized. 

Fast Friday 7.7.17

7-7-17 lady luck is on our side today! What makes you feel lucky? For me, elephants have always brought me a sense of peace and luck. I have little ones all over the place. I recently was drawn to this adorable little guy on Amazon.

When it arrived I did a little research on the stone (white howlite) and found that it can help with insomnia among many other things - so meet the newest edition to my bedside table!

Do you have any crystals or stones around your bedside? Drop a comment below! 

---

Link to shop: http://amzn.to/2u0asPJ

Rose and a Rose Gold Blow Dryer?

If you follow me on Instagram and Facebook  (and if you don't why aren't you?) then you know on Monday night my wonderful husband surprised me with not one, but two bottles of my favorite rosé (currently on sale for under $20 at costco)--- Miraval  --- ANDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD this bad ass white and rose gold blow dryer that I have had my eye on...the T3 Micro Featherweight Luxe 2I Dryer. 

 I hate hate hate blow drying my hair and on Monday night I couldn't wait to take a shower! Ladies and gents let me tell you about this beauty. 

Not only is it gorgeous to look at, so if you're super weird like me and want everything in your bathroom to match, you're set - its also super light weight, moderately quiet and dried my hair way way faster than normal. I had much less frizz and when I woke up I didn't look like I belonged in an 80s perm commercial like I normally do.  It has the standard speed setting and 3 different heat settings. The cord was longer than my current blow dryer which I didn't notice how annoying the old one was until I tried this one. 

The only negative I can see so far is that white cord seems to already be picking up some grime from being out in the bathroom (foundation hands anyone!). 

Overall I am super impressed with the quality - T3 makes a pretty awesome product all around, I also have a flat iron by them that I love that I will link below also. 

---

Shop the dryer here: http://amzn.to/2sqHzr6

Shop the flat iron here: http://amzn.to/2sqGAHH 

Fast Friday 6.30.17

Recently, I have started a new routine when I come home each day. I set my stuff down, walk to the microwave (no not to make food!) set the timer for 15 minutes and then I get productive! 

By setting the timer it majorly shifted my mindset of endless laundry, dishes, filing etc and makes it a really easy to accomplish task. 

I've noticed many times where I keep working through the timer - but here is the thing - I no longer feel "obligated" to get it all done. Its enough time to get stuff down, yet doesn't take up the whole evening. 

I'm curious to see how this works out for other people - drop me a comment  below if you plan on trying it, or do something similar! 

Happy Friday! 

xoxo | SLL 

#turnitaroundtuesday 6.27.17

Each Tuesday I try to help create positive thought by suggesting slight shifts to our thought process. Jenny Lewis is one of my favorite singers and an extremely extremely talented song writer. From Rilo Kiley to the Watson Twins to Voyager I have been along for the ride. 

One of the lyrics that has stuck with me the most is "You are what you love, not what loves you  back". Let that sink in for a minute. You are what YOU love. Everything that you put your energy is what reflects on you, not who happens to love you. You can apply this to so much more than romance. 

You are creativity. You are passion. You are healthy. You are devoted. You are loyal. 

You are whatever you set your intentions towards. So instead of being discouraged, set your focus on what you want to love. Stop giving power to things, people, situations you cannot control. 

It's OK to like your job...

Hey, guess what? Its ok to like your job. No really. You can be totally fulfilled and happy working a 9-5, or whatever version of it you do. 

A quick scroll of my Facebook this morning brought me so much negativity for the 9-5er. Well guess what folks - I happen to like my job. Don't get me wrong there are days when I too wish I could make my own schedule and pursue my passion projects with more focus, but I also like having a group health plan and knowing that if I show up and do good work I get a nice paycheck every other Wednesday. 

I like my couple weeks of paid vacation. I like having tech support. I like having coworkers. I like that I can call in sick if I need it and there is someone to cover my ass. I like working hard and being appreciated for it. I have a healthy work life balance, I have created a career for myself in which I excel and enjoy. 

I am so sick and tired of being told that I am not enough unless I am a work from home boss babe multi level marketing budding entrepreneur selling machine.

Why do we need to be so negative towards anyone that does something even slightly different than us? 

Why does everyone feel they need to rescue me from my job? Its almost that the paradigm has shifted so much that the struggling entrepreneur is the new high level CEO. Don't get me wrong, 100% see the allure in being self employed - but why is it not ok for someone to NOT want that? 

And please, before you even start - this has nothing to do with not being driven or working hard enough. I work hard and I am rewarded for it, both in my personal and professional life. 

Just quit with the judgement, and quit with the "you don't have to hate Mondays" and "How to escape corporate american in 5 easy steps" posts.

I'm not being held captive - I am very happy here. 

xoxo| SLL